Taiwan Immigration Update I

I'm going to start off this update with a picture of South Africa's new President. Jacob Zuma. You may notice that he's laughing. Well, considering how he escaped a very long prison sentence and somehow managed to climb up the political ladder to the pinnacle of power in SA, he has every reason to laugh. You may even think he's laughing at you. I'm sure, mostly he is. But today, he's laughing at me. And he's thinking, "Ah, my silly whitey. We want you to piss off, but before you go, we want to torture you some more."
You see, it seems the southern tip of Afrika will not release it's clutches unless it's given you an up the rear cavity search of a review of why you're immigrating. Just in case you forgot. Eish.

Three months ago I made the very inconvenient trip up to Taipei from Tainan to get my fingerprints taken (for my police clearance certificate) and to apply for a marital status certificate. The only two documents I need from South Africa. Thank all that's holy in this world!
I was ensured at length by one of the gentlemen there that the marital status wouldn't take longer than a month to six weeks at the most. It's been twice that and still no word.
Fortunately, I decided to delay sending my application for the police clearance as I suspected it would take longer due to elections, Easter and a myriad of public holidays and long weekends in South Africa during March and April. So, I sent it just over a month ago by registered airmail. This shouldn't have taken more than five to seven days to get to the Republic. However, almost four weeks after I'd sent it I get an e-mail from some woman in Alberton that says she's erroneously received my application papers in the post. I've checked the address and we definitely wrote it correctly on the envelope. How is this possible?

Now I need my aunt to go pick it up from this woman and then take it by hand to the Criminal records Bureau. As to the marital status certificate? Still no news. Perhaps that's also been lost in the post.
And all the while, JZ is laughing. Afrika. Is nice.